Efforts

Yesterday, a friend told me a story about it. I apologize that I cannot share it here because it is a little religious.

I learnt that even if your efforts are wasted, you have tried - this is the word 'tried' so I have not let myself down.

That issue is really a big blow to me. I often have the ‘power’ to hide my feelings so well that as if whatever bothers me seems non-existence. Last week, I thought that I have gotten over it but when I sat down to go through my thoughts; I started to break down again.

I want to tell the whole world that my family and friends are all very important no matter how well or badly they treat me, really.

This is why I always break down when anyone of them whom I treasure hurts me. This, either shows that I am weak or they are extremely important to me. But, obviously, it is the second option. Actions always speak louder than words. So, I hope that whatever I do, it could help them in one way and another.

Anyway, he is another one who said that since all my efforts are unappreciated; I should give up on that. But, should I? The feeling of giving up is…not good, something which I wish it does not happen on me at all. I have a feeling that I will go soft-hearted if I am being pleaded. Perhaps, I am so useless. =(

More disappointments and hurts are added, again.

Some say when you are down on luck, it keeps coming. Conversely, when you are in luck, it keeps coming.

I am down on luck, really. =)

But, what to do?

I believe in fate. All this is fated. The good time will arrive in no time. =D Hopefully.

But, I can promise not to let this bother anyone, at least my close ones. I keep my promise.
Anyway, now I really do understand the meaning of keeping a promise and understand why some hate promise-breakers. If I do not, slap me. I swear that I will not get angry. I am as serious as I can be.

What a tragedy to only understand and feel it now? Ha. Please do not belittle a promise.