Time check: 3 weeks

Within this period of time, I have experienced many things which I should have when I was much younger. However, due to so much restriction in the past, I did not go through that. But again, would I be a much different person if I did so? I don't know.

It seems like a little too late but now I know how a night life is like. But no, I have not picked up the habit of smoking yet and am not addicted to the night life. In the past, I used to wonder how it would feel like to vomit after too much drinks and now I know how terrible it was to puke as a result of that. Additionally, I know how drinks could temporary stop you from thinking especially you are down. And I am ashamed to admit that I asked a friend out for a drink on one of the days where I was really down. It helped me on that night because I was a little drunk to cry after that. Luckily for me, I have not experienced any hangover yet. = / Oh well, school is starting again so I will cut down a lot on drinks.

Sometimes I wish the whole world could understand how I feel instead of assuming how I feel. I get so tired that sometimes I would stare at them blankly and keep quiet instead of arguing and correcting what they say about me. My usual way is to smile like an idiot. Whatever. School is about to start again and I know I will start to cry a lot again because it will simply drain my emotional and mental health. I will not want to share how terrible it is to do a full time job and a part time degree as much as my first year. Period. The point is, you know that you will be entering Hell but you still have to enter it before you could achieve something you want. And, the worse is, I secretly hope that one day some people could understand what I am going through and stop expecting so much from me. I know that it will be an empty hope but what to do, I am always very silly. =(

Hello school and new friends! Goodbye freedom and see you in a year’s time! =’(